Once there was a future to live, a step to dance, no thoughts of sorrow,
Once there was a glimmer of sun, of rays shining through, of endless days laughter
Once there was a family surrounding, for nurturing , for giving, that was life for her.
Now she sits here old and frail, withered and pallid, shrunken and sad,
Looking back on a life that should have been good but one that turned out quite bad,
Now she sits here, fighting back tears, scared to shed them, frightened they would never cease,
Waiting each day, each month, each year for a time when she will feel at peace.
In her mind she remembers how life used to be, surrounded by siblings and close family,
Life without computers and mobiles and twitter, talking and sharing, just how it should be.
She remembers the joy of finding her husband to be,
The thrill of starting a new family.
The amazement of creating a brand new life, of that new unborn child growing inside her,
The desperation and horror of her husband battling cancer,
Of grieving his death and giving birth all alone,
Writing their new born daughters name on his stark grave stone.
But never was she the type to be beaten down,
She picked herself up and packed away her frown,
And a few years later a new husband she did meet,
And together they opened a sweet shop on Commercial Street.
Once her daughter was married, the sweet shop was sold,
And from the East End of London to the North West they moved,
But the heat from the days of happiness soon turned far too cold.
The ocean of calmness would no longer run smooth.
Her son in law was not what she once thought
And on the family many problems were wrought
All the money that she had she gave her daughter
To try and pay off all her husbands court orders.
Nothing was too much to give to help her daughter
Through years of hardship she tried to support her
And when her second husband passed away
With her daughter and son in law she went to stay.
And life took on a stability once more
Her grandchildren rapidly grew, numbering four,
And then in her world, the skies rapidly darkened, the rain lashed through her mind and the heavens were crying,
Her daughter was dying.
Life as she knew it no longer existed, the pain was too great, the hole inside too large,
To her, G-d had swept through her world, destroying it all on a trawling barge,
Her life now empty, hollow and dark,
All extinguished now, no more spark.
And so she sits there old and frail, withered and pallid, shrunken and sad,
Living among memories, watching the time tick away, remembering what she once had,
Living minute to minute and hour to hour and day to day and year to year,
Living a hollow existence no longer wanting to be here.
0 comments:
Post a Comment